A Roadmap to Creating a Culture of Ongoing Feedback at Work
Written by Catherine V. Hyde, PCC, Leadership Coach for Winning Ways, Inc.
Many managers struggle with giving feedback at work. Do you long to make feedback conversations easier? Here is a path forward.
Build Trust and Encourage Ongoing Feedback at Work
Catching someone doing something right is the single most powerful feedback you can offer. Holding it up encourages and inspires us.
Many people are surprised to learn that human beings have an unlimited ability to hear positive feedback. We often think that if we praise someone too often, they will think of us as insincere. But the truth is they won’t think we are being insincere unless we are being insincere. (We have all received insincere compliments, and we can detect them pretty easily. So that is NOT what I am recommending here.)
I am talking about a variant of that old adage: “If you don’t have something nice to say, say nothing at all.” Let’s flip that to: “If you have something nice to say, by all means, say it.”
We often jump to point out what is wrong or needs fixing. For many of us, we have been taught to do that, at home, in school, and at work. We are, unfortunately, not taught to call out what is working, what is good, and what is fine.
And that’s a shame because positive feedback is perhaps the most important feedback you can give. That’s because:
- It doesn’t trigger our defenses, so we can hear it and take it in.
- Sometimes it holds up something we did not know we were doing well, so we can be aware and focus on doing more of that.
And here is the biggie:
- It builds trust so that when we give more difficult feedback, it’s easier for the person to hear it from us.
Not only do we emotionally respond to compliments, but physically, our brain’s response is the same as being paid monetary rewards. Let that sink in.
Some studies suggest that this brain activity is correlated with higher levels of skills consolidation—an integral type of learning we do in our sleep.
And it’s easy, but it might take some intentionality to make it happen. (That means you might have to put a task in your calendar to think about it and encourage yourself to actually do it!)
Steps to Motivating Humans (of all ages)
- Catch someone doing something right.
- Point it out; lift it up.
- Tell them why it is appreciated. This helps them know it is, indeed, sincere.
- Bonus points: Explain how they could leverage that strength to tackle a different project or challenge.
If you can do it in public, say in a team meeting, you not only “praise in public” but you are clarifying for the entire team a behavior that is helpful. You’re giving feedback that not only is easy to hear but helps establish team norms.
Some Examples of giving positive feedback at work
“I really appreciate how you managed your calm response to that frustrating email. That shows true leadership and reflects our value of assuming good intent.”
“Veena, I really appreciate the thorough agenda you set out for us today. It will help us stay on task and make the meeting more effective.”
And for bonus points:
“I’ll bet if you brought an agenda to the fractious user testing team meetings, it might help keep them focused.”
Engage the Team in the Same Behavior
Encourage your entire team to give positive feedback to each other. Once you start doing this regularly, they might pick it up on their own. But they might not, too. So, encourage the behavior.
Maybe discuss adding “We support and encourage each other” to your list of team norms. Or, ask everyone to come with a compliment for a team member to the next team meeting.
Make Ongoing Development a Priority
In the workplace today, if we are not actively learning new skills and behaviors, we are falling behind. So, identify what you are working on. It might be:
- better delegation
- better listening
- leaning into your values
- getting out of the weeds
- better focus
- work-life balance
Whatever it is, it must start with you.
This is vulnerable stuff and if you are not willing to do it first, it won’t happen. And it takes some self-awareness to identify behaviors that could use some work. But trust me, we all have them. If you cannot find some on your own, ask a trusted colleague what it might be helpful for you to improve on.
Share what you are working on with your team, and tell them how they can support you in that learning. You can do this in a team meeting or in your one-on-ones.
Some Examples of How to Encourage Feedback at Work
“I am working on being a better listener, and I know I sometimes get so excited that I interrupt people. I want to stop doing that, so I’d like to ask for your help. If I interrupt you, please stop me. I would really appreciate your support on this.”
“I want to be a better delegator. Can you offer me some things I might do better when I am delegating to you or to others on the team?”
“I want to get out of the weeds and empower you more. But sometimes I miss the tactical work and I dive in to help or solve a challenge for you. If I do that, please call it to my attention, so I can step back and let you tackle it.”
“I am having trouble carving out time to focus. I want to spend the first 90 minutes of my day focused on my deliverables. I’m going to turn off notifications until 10 am every morning. I’d like to ask you to hold off asking me for things, as much as possible, until after 10 am. Now if it’s an emergency, text or call me.”
“I need to create more work-life balance. Could you help me identify meetings that you perhaps don’t need me to be in? Are there some meetings you would feel able to manage without me? What might you need to feel ready to do that?”
Ask Your Team What They Are Working On and How You Can Support Them
After you have engaged your team in supporting your development, in private conversations, ask each team member what they are working on and how you can support them.
They might struggle to identify something, and you can help in several ways. Ask them:
- What is working and what is not working?
- What has them frustrated?
- What makes them lose patience?
- What do they want to learn more about?
Their answers will be clues as to where they might want to improve.
Some common challenges and how to address them:
- Feeling overwhelmed: Do they need help to prioritize or renegotiate deliverables? Or permission to say no to some tasks? Or help being less of a perfectionist? Or to learn to ask for help?
- Getting others to respond to their request for information: Do they need help learning to motivate and persuade? Or help becoming a better communicator? Or get stronger at building relationships?
- Getting their direct reports to deliver better work: Do they need to work on the fine art of delegation? Or setting clear expectations? Do they need project management support, like the RACI method or another tool?
- Giving stronger presentations: Do they need a LinkedIn course on giving strong presentations? Do they need to brainstorm with you their key messages and how to stay focused on them? Do they need more opportunities to practice?
Beyond the obvious advantages of helping your team continuously grow and improve, all this work does one very important thing:
It normalizes giving and receiving feedback at work.
So when something goes wrong, you and your team members are accustomed to looking at what worked and what didn’t and discussing how to address it.
If you need help to create a culture of feedback at work, you might consider a session or two of executive leadership coaching.
About Catherine Hyde
In addition to coaching for Winning Ways, Catherine has worked in social justice for 25 years. She is the founder of Navigating What’s Next, specializing in coaching, consulting, speaking, and learning development. She is a graduate of Georgetown’s Executive Certificate program in Leadership Coaching and is PCC-certified by the International Coaching Foundation.
Catherine did not listen to her child who, at the age of 4, told her that something had gone wrong in her belly and that he was supposed to be a she. Her child’s journey, as the first youth to transition in her school system, inspired Catherine’s advocacy. She volunteers with PFLAG (the oldest and largest organization supporting LGBTQ+ people and their loved ones) and speaks and trains on gender understanding and sensitivity.
